Your Personal Anthem

Serenity, Firefly class vesselIf nations have anthems, why shouldn’t you? I mean, what’s the difference between a large united aggregate of people organized around something in common and all the united aggregate stuff of you? Very little, if you ask me.

So what’s holding you back? Today is the day, my loyal readers. Focus on that deep internal pool of self-centeredness and pull out your personal anthem. If you’re the type to create something from nothing with musical instruments then take that route.

But for the rest of us, luckily there are plenty of previously created songs for us to steal choose from. (You’re dying to know mine, aren’t you?) First, there are several things to consider when co-opting a musician’s creative endeavor for your own self-indentification. Let’s begin. [Read more...]

RRS Roundup: Lizard Brains and Terminal Viscosity

This week on Read it! Review it! Share it! I’m highlighting a couple of Indie eBooks I’m pretty dang sure you haven’t read but that you should enjoy.

The Reality War Book1: The Slough of Despond

Slough of DespondSome of you may recognize the “slough of despond” from the classic tale, “Pilgrim’s Progress.” The connection is just one way this time-travel, science fiction novel sets its self apart from the pack. I’m one of those sorts who loves history as well as science fiction. So Taylor’s use of Elstow Abbey as one of the time traveling stations scores points with me.

The main character, Radlan, has been stationed upstream of time (the 1970′s through 90′s) longer than anyone else in the history of the service created to protect the timeline. Possibly too long. Thus begins the tension in the story from page one.

A love interest from the past complicates his assignment to not only protect the timeline but also protect witnesses the future government places in the past for protection. Tension in the 1990′s, tension in the 2900′s. You get the idea. Well, before it’s all done time starts to go sideways and the result is a wild ride well worth reading.

Terse, tense and emotional, the Slough of Despond generates a cool balance between science, history and human relationship. Read it! Review it! Share it!

Terminal Departure: A Cleo Matts Novel

Terminal Departure is a conspiracy-thriller with a sense of humor. Reading it reminds me of Orson Scott Card’s Empire mixed with Men in Black. The lead character, Cleo Matts, works for a government agency so secret that secret agencies don’t know about it. Which is important since most of the planet has been duped by aliens.

The dialogue includes gems like this (between Matts and the starlet sitting beside him on a plane he’s trying to keep from blowing up):

terminal departure

“That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever hear.” She close her magazine and slid it into the pocket ahead of her. “Joking aside, what do you really do?”

“When I’m not mushing?”

“Yes,” she smiled, wearily. “When you’re not…mushing.”

“I’m a shepherd,” he said. “And, sometimes, I’m a topless waitress.”

She glanced lower. “You don’t have the chest for it.”

“I only moonlight as a topless waitress.”

“Lots of tips?”

“You’d be surprised,” he said.

It made me laugh. Humor is hard to come by, especially in any sort of book other than one that is only funny when it isn’t supposed to be. Now, I will provide one warning. The president of the United States is depicted as seeking solace in the shower via a little one-hand mambo. So if that goes too far off the cheeky end for you, consider yourself warned. Read it! Review it! Share it!

Read, Review and Share (RRS)

Charton Heston holds the ten commandmentsRRS has formed the backbone of human society since man invented the stone tablet and Charlton Heston went Biblical on it. It’s true.

All forms of art, communication and societal organization rely on informed participants passing on their opinions. The same is true for the written word. And especially the independent writer/novelist such as yours truly.

Here is an example of a recent success story. [Read more...]

Sanctity of Zombie Life

Caution sign for zombiesThe time has come to announce the announcement of pulling back the curtain on my next novel. Why is this important? you may ask. (Thanks for the vote of confidence.) I’ll tell you, my loyal readers.

If you value the sanctity of life, both that of humans and savage zombie-like post-humans, then my next novel is essential for both your entertainment and education. Currently, I am in process of writing (take a deep breath) the seminal piece of literature addressing the rights of zombie-esque beings.

I hesitate to attempt to express how important the publishing of this novel will prove to be for current and future generations for a few reasons: [Read more...]

Jackasses Will Always be With Us

Haterade image for Get into the Head before JockFor the fourth and final installment of The Green Porch’s Guide to Courteous Critique, I’m expressing my confusion. Is it fashionable to hate apples because they don’t taste like oranges? So why do people think it’s legitimate to read pulp fiction and then hate on it because it isn’t teen romance?

And has anyone noticed hate-nastics often include all the same buzz phrases? Are these auditions for The Next American Jerk-A? Look, I get it. It’s easier to sound smart when criticizing something than when praising it. Every monkey loves his banana. But to describe it as thick-skinned, moldy and lacking pungency makes me sound like one cool gorilla.

That’s why part four of the guide is about ignoring the inevitably erroneous critiques when we get them.

Ignore them, they won’t go away.

What was it Jesus said about the poor? That they will always be with us. This wasn’t intended to let us of the hook when it comes to caring for them, but it was meant to help us prioritize. If Jesus were writing this post he would tell everyone that jackasses will always be with us. [Read more...]

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Trickster by Matt Dembicki

Haterade is for Sipping

Haterade image for Get into the Head before JockAs part of the Green Porch’s continuing efforts to help guide human behavior toward more sustainable ends, we bring you rule number three in our series, “Guide to Giving Courteous Critique”…

But before we get to that, I thought it would be worth mentioning a few things I’ve discovered, as of late, I don’t hate:

As a matter of fact, I love the above three things and will be blogging about each in turn over the next few weeks. Ahhh. Now doesn’t that feel therapeutic? Get on the love train folks, because it’s time for rule three of giving courteous critique:

Haterade is for Sipping

There, I said it. Now don’t get me wrong. Haterade is a powerful elixir, and has its place and purpose around the sphere of artistic endeavor. Where would we be if Milli Vanilli hadn’t received the heavy dousing of haterade they so rightly deserved? Or if reality T.V. hadn’t gotten booed from the primetime stage… (oh, crap). [Read more...]