American Flag Waving, Hemp Style

Here at the Green Porch it’s my duty every now and then to remind y’all that you’re killing the earth and dooming human kind to hell.

Whether its due to driving an SUV, implanting a cell phone chip in your brain or refusing to give up Survivor-style reality TV, we are, each of us, brewing our own stew of the end times. But hey, with a little Worcestershire that stew could have some real zing.

On a preventative note, this last week was the fourth annual Hemp History Week. By golly it was an American-flag-waving celebration of the sort of manifest destiny that made this nation great. Are you going to spend another year sitting around in your cotton briefs allowing those Washington bureaucrats to tell you what you can and can’t farm in your raised garden beds? [Read more…]

Apocalyptic Gardening

attack of killer tomatoWhen the end of civilization comes knocking you don’t want to be stuck scrambling for Alpo among the zombie hordes at Albertsons. The best means to ensure a continuous supply of foodstuffs throughout the apocalypse is to plant a healthy end times garden full of the essentials. In this post I’ll cover the basics of apocalyptic gardening.

Location: Don’t go planting your new garden in your backyard. That’s the first place resentful neighbors will ransack, and as much as you might try, you probably won’t be able to kill them all. [Read more…]