Dr. Pepper Archives - David Mark Brown

Dr. Pepper Kills Beloved Dublin Brand… Why?

February 3, 2012January 12, 2012 by David Mark Brown

Okay. Contracts were broken. But how is that worse than lying on your taxes? This past Wednesday Dr. Pepper Snapple killed the “Dublin Dr. Pepper” brand name. They claim it was to protect the diluting of their Dr. Pepper trademark. Read more about it here.

So nine different Dr. Pepper products (including Dr. Pepper 10. What the hell is that?) is just fine, but ten is watered down? And aren’t they just going to keep making Dublin Dr. Pepper at other bottlers anyway? (The answer is yes.) So… they still have the same amount of trademark-watering-down Dr. Pepper products as before.

The only difference is that now instead of “Dublin Dr. Pepper,” ~~fanatics~~ aficionados will be drinking “Dr. Pepper made will real cane sugar.”

3 Worst Things about the Apocalypse

May 16, 2012September 15, 2011 by David Mark Brown

Dr. Pepper Museum While I expect a few good things to happen via apocalypse (ie. a flourishing of “buy local first” and “slow foods” campaigns), I also suspect lots of crappy things could happen as result of global, wholesale Armageddon. In the comments below I’ll want to hear your list for the top three things that will suck the most, but to get the old zombie fodder cranked up, I’ll share mine.

3.) Looting of the Dr. Pepper Museum:

As we all witnessed in Bagdad, then New Orleans, apocalyptic levels of looting inevitably leads to the wanton destruction of anything even remotely valuable. But the priceless relics and preserved history of our great species and the civilizations we’ve built are at highest risk.

Confessions of a Dr. Pepper Addict

September 25, 2012June 20, 2011 by David Mark Brown

How many of you own an honest to goodness flag emblazoned with the logo of your favorite soft drink? (O.K. several of you.) But do you also have photographic evidence of a college dorm room wall decorated with sticky 12 ounce cans?

Satan’s syrup, white mambo, carob powder. However you pronounce it, there is an addictive chemical used in every can of Dr. Pepper which makes you crave it much more often than fortnightly. While this disastrous addiction is spreading like gangrene across the United States resulting in increased blood pressure, diabetes, obesity, irritable bowel and the sugar shakes, one tiny section of Texas still sucks down their juice pure–the forty square miles between Stephenville and Hico.

The original bottler of Dr. Pepper in Dublin, Texas still shoots their bottles up with pure Imperial Cane Sugar.