The Green Porch Archives - Page 6 of 30

The Porch’s Winter of Reading (e-style)

December 1, 2011 by David Mark Brown

The buzz acronym for your winter will be GPWeR — the GreenPorch’s Winter of eReading. (Trendy insiders pronounce it /Jeep’ – wer/). All winter the GreenPorch will be filling you in and keeping you up to speed with everything eReading/eReader.

Blog posts will include such informative gems as: “What’s a Kobo?”, “5 reasons I don’t suck like other Indie Authors” and “Top redneck eReads.” You’ll find out what happens when you kindle a nook of your pad. And of course there will be plenty of GreenPorch style tell-all industry secrets (stuff I make up and spread as truth).

But seriously.

Redneck Sustainability: 5 Cyber Monday Cures

November 28, 2011 by David Mark Brown

In our consumerism drunk society Cyber Week is the virtual hangover from Thanksgiving’s Black Friday. And the whole things seems to be focusing on gluttony a scoche more than gratitude (if you ask me). But once again, rednecks can show the rest of us the way toward a more sustainable life by offering us cures to the Cyber Week blues.

Think General. The rural predecessor to today’s tawdry dollar store was the dime store, or the general store. In some parts of rural America rednecks continue to benefit from the simplicity of true one-stop holiday shopping at said stores. And in this instance I don’t mean Walmart’s brand of one-stop shopping. Duplicating the general store experience today requires some creative thought to figure out which one, local establishment could provide all of your gift-giving needs. Rather than coming up with specific present ideas, get a general idea, go to your chosen store and peruse while your mind ruminates over each person on your list. (I’m heading to the state liquor store this year!)

Thanksgiving: Whine and Humble Pie

November 21, 2011 by David Mark Brown

Nothing makes one more grateful/thankful than catching a whiff of whining leaking from one’s brain like a tire with a nail. (Tire air always smells so rank too, like dried barf and erasers.)

I’m one of those people who loves life as long as it loves me back, but a hang nail can get me out of sorts. I’m a whiner. Well maybe I don’t whine as much as pout. If you’ve ever played cards with me, you’ve seen it. I mean, why won’t something as fickle as random chance let me win more than 0.5% of the time? It’s not like I play cards with 100 other people at once. (Of course there is the possibility that I suck at cards, but that’s loser talk.)

With Thanksgiving days away, I’m feeling a bit mushy–like I want to hug the cosmos and apologize for having a bad attitude about the last month of sick kids and wife. Due to quarantining them, taking lots of Airborne and demanding extra sleep, I’ve stayed mostly healthy so that I can continue to blog. (Sometimes I’m just so darn noble. Does anyone else smell barf and erasers?)