Lost DMB Files

A Steer in a World of Vegetarians (or Damn you YA!)

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steer calf[dropcap2]W[/dropcap2]hich would be better, being a freshly born bull calf who gets his nuts chopped off and a year later slaughtered to feed man’s hunger for beef? Or, as a bull calf you get your nuts chopped off just in time to find out that the world has suddenly gone vegetarian? Surely you can see the dilemma. On the one hand, you get to go on living a considerably less purposeful life. On the other you are used for what you were forced to become.

This is how I’m beginning to see the creative industry. Novelists are streaming to young adult literature (YA) because readers appear to be youngening even as they get older. (It’s not because 16 year-olds are suddenly reading more. It’s because their parents are raiding their bookshelves.) Why read at the eighth grade level when one can find books for adults written at the fifth grade level? It just wastes brain energy one could use for sudoku or for understanding the witty quips on Castle.

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The Weird West Reboot

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TV's The Wild, Wild West

[dropcap2]I[/dropcap2]n the 1960’s, as the American genre of the Western guttered in its final death throes, a new sort of Western birthed onto the scene replacing the Wild West with what has become known as the Weird West. Most prominently, the Weird West is defined by its landmark accomplishment, CBS Studio’s The Wild Wild West.

Aside: After my last post, it has come to my attention that several of you, my faithful readers, have begun to question the lucidity of my waking state (and whether mind-altering substances might be involved). But I assure you, the indelibility of my turpitude is purely natural (and more importantly, untransferable).

Unsurprisingly, considering the fact that CSI’s newest show will be based in Lake Wobegon (just kidding, it’s probably going to end up being Seattle) CBS has resorted to rebooting old favorites. This season they gave us the chance to feel the sun and surf course through our veins as we lip sync the gritty phrase, “Book ’em, Danno.” It appears that for the coming season, attempts will be made to revive The Wild Wild West, the poster child of all that is weird with westerns.

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The Fourth Horseman

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If the Dustbowl itself can’t erase the regrets that haunt the Fourth Horseman, it’s unlikely the tequila will. Besides, what’s Armageddon without Death? (coming in April)   First, an introduction. Hidely-ho, reader. I’m the writer best known as David Mark Brown and the infamous RedneckGranola. You may know me from such websites as www.thegreenporch.com or … Read more The Fourth Horseman